A Ritual of Renewal

After the ceremony comes a time of great jubilation. The bride and groom run off, the guests rise up, the party begins after the photographs are taken. Afterwards, what has changed? Names have changed, relationships have changed, boundaries have changed. Now the two have become one and the result is greater than the sum of the parts. Where comes the extra, the added parts? Quantum physics and magick tell us that perception can generate that which is perceived. If you believe an orange skinned real estate salesman is capable of sending nuclear missiles to vaporize an entire nation, they might just do that. And if you believe a man you never met before last week is your brother, then he is your brother. You gained a brother when your daughter married a man. Likewise you may have gained cousins, sisters, nephews and partners through this ritual in which two pledge to do what is right for two to do. It has nothing to do with babies or gods or even social understandings, but it is an ethical way to express out loud the feelings which have been created by two becoming one. The result can be epic. When Di married Chuck the world of the West shook with various degrees of joy, and yet afterwards little was changed. The Queen was still the queen and none of them use surnames, so they did not change either. I would argue that on September 9th there were greater and long lasting changes made which will in time have impacts to a great number of families and friends.
A ritual of renewal changes a woman to a goddess, and a miss into a missus, a daughter into a wife, a man into a husband. Duties may not be changed in a relationship which has lasted many years, but the feelings now are different. When a man does a nice thing for his lover and friend, it kind and rewarding in kind, but when a husband does something nice for his wife, it brings on the feelings of the One which came into being as a result of that ritual. A marriage is reinforced more than just a mans love of another. Consider that a lover presents a gift as part of a courtship. Afterwards, after the marriage ceremony the courtship of the lover has stopped, but the courtship and nurturing of the spouse has begun. Often you hear of how after a marriage the man suddenly becomes abusive or cold. The ritual had failed, often because it was confused for a “party”. Parties do not transform, they entertain briefly. So thought must be put into all aspects of a ritual, dense, multi-layered thoughts on placement, color and meaning. Then the participants should be at some level aware of the intent, purpose, direction and rules of the ritual. The ring or rings must be understood as symbols and not jewelry. Drinks immediately afterwards should be drinks of ceremonial value, the Toast defines them as such, and all the important individuals may deliver Toasts, which should be understood even as ritual components of a ceremony currently being enacted. They are spells. Each primary participant has a costume, a special garb, festooned with symbolic flowers, jewels or decorations. The male/female parts are balanced with the groomsmen and the bridesmaids. The ritual of separation finalizes the vows, and the ceremony moves on. Each day may be a ritual of renewal in a loving environment. The people are energized and inspired for their participation in the ritual. Within a year a new child will come into the world as a direct result of this ritual, even several children might come forth.
In this way all of us are renewed. We move up the ladder a bit, new footing, new ideas bringing forth new things. Understanding the way this works and the importance of the understanding, is how we move gladly through the changes, rather than fearful of the new.

Last Saturday our daughter was married and we had the most amazing and fun wedding ever, at least according to all the attendees. After the smoke had cleared and the bottles and glasses picked up, after the hotel keys were found and the sprained ankles looked at, the horn was drained, the birds were singing and the world awoke to a new dawn, a new age. This, of course, means that my sweet wife and I are Old News. Over the hill, gone beyond Now into History. If I have learned anything about history it is that every mans history is another’s future. Each time I note another new age spot, a new ache, I see the joy in her eyes as she said “I will” and the look in his eyes was so similar to one i had when I told my new bride how beautiful she was. Now what do we have to look forward to? Gee, I suppose we could see a grandchild, but these days nothing is assured. How could two intelligent people bring a child into a world filled with fascists, nationalists, “religious” extremism? In our globalized world no armed clash is local, especially when your government is fond of selling weapons to people. But, and it’s a big but, we have a small group of disconnected idiots trying to squeeze the last drops from an old era and they are in charge of things as they are now. Increasingly we know that governments are installed by money for the defense of money, and rarely concern themselves with the lives of the people. Consider a reductio ad absurdum : two humans left on the planet, and one has all the money. The other has a stone. The first one wants the stone badly, so they offer up some of the money, but the second does not wish to sell. The price war advances until finally the owner of the stone sells it for all of the money. Now there is a new stone owner and a new rich person, so this is an economy, yes? but does it create or advance humanity in any way? No. So, economies by themselves are not life supporting. Exchanging goods and services for money gets you nothing. Now, suppose we have a half dozen people and one has the money, one has a stone, one has grown wheat and one has nothing but sexual organs and a willingness to use them. The rich person gives all of his money for the stone. The new rich man gives part of his money for the stick, some for sex and the rest he places in a hole beneath his sleeping area. The man with wheat trades wheat for sex and the female agrees to help him steal the money to buy a stone…. and so forth. Now, the economy moves along with many more people and trade goods, but the money per se is not the main factor here. Suppose two of the people get married and merge their fortunes and goods? This is not an economy exactly, but what is exchanged results in an increase of what is held to be valuable. Each feels rewarded, loved, protected, respected etc and no money, no stone or stick passes hands. Sex, sure, but not as a trade but as an expression of love. So: an economy based on love and respect does more good than an economy based on exchanges of material goods. Barter rather than profit, and consensus rather than bargaining. In the marriage ceremony both partners promise to do that which they already have willingly been doing: love, honor, respect and care for the other. If humanity married humanity there could be no wars. If we loved the gestalt of life the way we love our partners, there could be no wars. It would be nice if all our marriage ceremonies included the promise to “take care of the Earth, to respect Life and those within the Sphere of Life…” because after all, if a marriage were to result in children, how much nicer a world it would be dedicated to love and devotion rather than profit making, wars and distrust.